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Posted by Laura Tubo (68.76.176.214) on 21:41:33 13/12/04
So I know you are all anxiously awaiting the scan results...so are we! They had yet to read it by the clinic visit today. Joey's other testing including heart and CT was all good. His blood counts were also good. The urine no longer showed cells, an indicator of kidney damage. So, we are counting on that earlier finding being a temporary result of the radiation. Despite a LONG day at the clinic, Joey looks just wonderful. He had a great weekend hanging out with family. But, he was tired from all of it. It shows in the occasional outburst. Every time he yells at someone, it just affirms his fighting spirit for me. Still, in the moment, it is hard to take. Last night he said to me at bedtime, "Mommy, remember those days when I was 3 and I could eat or not eat? (in other words, he had the choice--it wasn't a requirement each day) Remember those days? I MISS THOSE DAYS!" (with clenched teeth and fist) I know it is completely healthy for him to be verbalizing this to me, but it still rips at my heart. I don't think he should be looking back at the sweeter times of his youth at the old age of 4! I see his sweet and innocent side each day, but in these "wise moments", it is difficult for me to see how much he has grown up. His take on life does keep me going. During prayers he said, "Thank you God for God--because he made you AND me Mommy!" Joey just reminds me to give this struggle and uncertainty to HIM. It is ultimately the best medicine. And, all of your prayers will see us through. I'll keep you posted if you keep us in prayer. Til next time....love.
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