Posted by Laura Tubo August 23, 2005
Many of you have commented lately on
my infrequent BLOG entries. And, in response, I have told you that I am
having trouble coming up with entries. I have been flattered to learn that
so many find my entries inspiring. This has led to a certain amount of
pressure to emote some literary greatness each time I sit down at the
computer. Truth is, we have been living such a normal life, that I have lost
a certain ability to write. But, today I have regained my sense that
normalcy in itself is filled with greatness.
Today, my strong faith in Joey's
healing is once again being tested. I do not intend to alarm anyone, but I
must tell you that I woke up this morning with such a sense of stability. I
go to bed tonight feeling once again the realization that each moment of my
life, of my son's life, is completely out of my control. His scans were not
definitively negative. We learned today that his
CT scan is
completely normal. His
MIBG
scan MAY not be. There was some faint evidence of a small area of uptake.
What does this mean? No one knows right now. The first radiologist read a
small area of uptake in the right upper abdomen. This was to be correlated
with the CT,
which, again, was NORMAL. So, another radiologist read the
MIBG
and did not see what the first one did. This leaves our oncologist
scratching her head---a finding that, quite frankly, leaves ME with a
headache. So, the plan from here is
to study his blood for any clues. And then, to rescan him in a month. Til
then, Joey will continue to live his normal life. He starts preschool on
Sept. 9th. And, tonight, I signed him up for YMCA gymnastics with his
sister. Gina starts the second grade tomorrow. Jeff and I have scheduled a
weekend getaway at the end of next month. Life will be normal. The hard part
is how uncertain our normal remains. At the end of the day, the best
medicine for Joey and all of us is prayer. At the end, the beginning, and
each moment in between, I must remember this. I thank all of you for
remembering us at those times too.
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